THE 7TH ANNUAL TELLING OF THE STORY OF SANTA’S NEW GOLF SWING – AN OVER THE TOP CHRISTMAS TALE

 

THE 5TH ANNUAL TELLING OF THE STORY OF SANTA’S NEW GOLF SWING – AN OVER THE TOP CHRISTMAS TALE
NORTH POLE – The golf season at the North Pole is short so people like Santa, his elves and others from here are, naturally, very poor golfers. No matter how much they want to, becoming proficient at the game presents the same obstacles year after year. Everyone’s got that over the top, outside-in swing path. How can one learn a proper golf swing in the course of a month–and-a-half golf season?  And businesses that cater to golfers are rarer than scores in the 80s in these parts. Around Christmas time, consumers here don’t have a great need to update their lessons, equipment, golf instruction videos and eBooks other than to stock up on those orange Top Flites. Poor Santa Claus had reached his wits end.


Most people have conflicts involving business and family. That wasn’t the case with Santa. There’s Mrs. Claus, of course, but her interests by now are mostly trying to manage Santa’s cholesterol. And his work year basically consists of one day…. Well, one madcap evening to be precise. You don’t really think it was him who answered your letter in 1962 do you? No, Santa really should be a scratch player but for the ice and snow.

Most golf instructors are reluctant to travel 3,000 miles for a 45 day golf season so lessons here are practically non-existent. Santa, however, manages to fit a twilight lesson in on Christmas Day at Doral before the reindeer whisk him back to the chilly north. Therein lies St. Nick’s problem. Many of the elves residing at the North Pole are self-taught golfers but they routinely kick Santa’s ass. Every year his trip back home from sunny Miami is filled with optimism at how he would soon squash each and every one of those elves and take their money at the 19th hole. Talk about visions of sugar plums dancing in his head….

But alas, each year saw the same result. Mrs. Claus admonishing Santa for losing his hard-earned cookies and milk to those pesky and opportunistic elves. “The golf lessons are too difficult” he would cry out. “They are asking a 350 pound man to swing inside-out, impact the ball with a square clubface and finish in perfect balance on his left side.”

Well guess what? Santa discovered the secret to the elves’ domination. The mystery of how a bunch of dwarfs were able to consistently get into the big guy’s pocket was known as The OVER THE TOP GOLF swing . Santa, along with about a half-million hackers throughout the world, had wandered right past the solution to all of their golf-swing problems. The ability to walk confidently up to the tee and smack a long drive straight down the fairway was now in his bag and man, would he make those elves pay!!

It was actually Mrs. Claus who learned about the OVER THE TOP GOLF eBook from a child’s letter. The youngster had learned the OVER THE TOP GOLF® swing and began shooting under par. The child had written to ask Santa for a new set of Mizunos so he could pursue his dream of playing on the PGA Tour. With this golf instruction method, Santa discovered that by employing just five set-up changes, he could use his own golf swing to achieve great results on the links – even with his outside-in swing path. And of course, by now, his handicap was up to a hefty 30 strokes.

The elves never had a chance.

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Originally published 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013 and 2014